What men think directly after ejaculation and how it could affect you

The late great comedian Richard Pryor during his stand-up routine used to joke that directly before a man achieved orgasm you could ask and receive anything from him. Want to get married? This is the time to ask. Need a new car? This is the time to get it. Because during this time he is at your mercy.

It was funny when Richard Pryor said it and it’s still funny today and what most people don’t know is that it’s pretty much true. How many times have you made love to a man who was neither a husband or boyfriend (per say) and during this intense few seconds he blurted out something totally unexpected, such as “I love you?” Caught you by surprise, didn’t it?

What Richard didn’t joke about during his heyday on the stage was the other side of your love-making session. Those seconds after men achieve ejaculation and what signs they reveal that are very important to you as women. These brief seconds, these first moments of clarity, if scrutinized properly will tell you all you need to know about where this relationship is headed or if its going anywhere at all.

Many of you have had a man chase you, send you flowers, candy or take you to dinner and treat you like a queen. Sometimes this ritual took weeks or even months before you decided to reward him by allowing him the opportunity to make love to you. After this, what you considered a successful and rewarding love-making session, he changed. His demeanor, his persistent chasing, his phone calls, his being there all stopped.

This left you feeling used, confused and you wondered if it was something you said or did. You also begin to question if he liked making love to you or maybe even if you didn’t do it right and he didn’t like it. All of these questions and many more like them haunt your thoughts for weeks on end afterwards.

Then there is the guy that you make love to for the first time and afterwards he’s like a puppy. He calls you as promised the same day after the love-making session, just to tell you what a great time he had with you the night before. He wants to be wherever you are. He’s waiting for you to get off work so that he can take you to dinner, the movies, shopping or anywhere you would like to go.  He compliments you, waits hand and foot on you and wants to spend every free moment of time with you.

Now, with both of these guys something happened during the first 30 seconds after they ejaculated and you saw it but you didn’t know what it was. Had you paid attention or rather knew the signs you were looking for you could have saved your heartache on the first one because you could have predicted the outcome and called it what it was, simply a f**k for him. However, the knowledge you gained from observing these 30 seconds will tell you a little about yourself and what he thought about you as well.

As for the second guy, you would have observed those signs to and if love was what you were seeking then you could have it. If you were only in it for the sex, then you could inform him of that quickly and not break his heart in the process.

By now you’re wondering, what happens in these 30 seconds after he ejaculates? Clarity.

“30 seconds after ejaculation, men have one of two thoughts enter their mind. God I love her, or what the hell did I just do!”

How do you determine what he’s thinking during this brief 30 second time frame? You pay attention and these are the signs you’ll observe. You’ve all seen them before, only you didn’t know what they meant or what they would lead to.

Now, lets look at them closely and think back to all of the situations you’ve encountered over the years and you’ll understand what I mean.

Upon completion of your first lovemaking session with a new man, if he is thinking, “God, I love her”, he’ll want to cuddle with you. He’ll lay there exhausted but pleased on the bed of lust and hold you, he’ll kiss you repeatedly and all of this while laying in the wet spot without complaint. He’ll talk sweetly to you, remove the sweat from your brow and inquire as to if you enjoyed it as much as he.

If you chose to make love to him again that night or in the morning he’ll be there ready to please you again. He’ll be gentle and caring and he’ll want to know what feels good to you. If you simply want to lay in bed and talk about nothing in particular, he’ll oblige you and hang onto every word you say. He’ll be silly with you, laugh at your humor and make you feel like you’ve known him your whole life and that you two were meant to be as one.

When he tells you that he will call you later in the day, you can count on it. More than likely, upon leaving he will send you text messages anyway, telling you how much he enjoyed being with you.

Now, if you really only slept with him to take care of your physical needs for that night then it behooves you to let him know this as soon as you see these signs. Otherwise you risk hurting someone who really is into you. Don’t allow him to leave thinking that you two will one day possibly be man and wife. Let him down gently, be an adult and realign his expectations. I’m just saying, there’s nothing like a man scorn as well.

However, for the flip side of this lets look at what happens when he is thinking, “What the hell did I just do?”

If this thought flashes across his mind there will be no cuddling, chances are that as soon as he ejaculates he’ll get up and clean himself in the restroom with the door shut. He’ll be leaving you to your own thoughts about how well you performed or if he’s satisfied. If and when he returns to the bed, he’ll probably talk to you for a few minutes about nothing in particular or dive into your background in regards to sex.

He brings up sex in his conversation solely so that you can talk about your past history and the things you’ve tried and want to try. Not because he’s interested in you, but because by talking about sex with you it will allow him to become aroused again and he can do it all again. What you must understand about this ritual is this, it’s all about him, and him achieving orgasm, not you. You simply just happened to be still there.

After the second session if he’s at your place he’ll be making an excuse to leave. He has to get up early is always a good excuse to go. If unfortunately you are at his place he’ll be hinting that its time for you to leave. If not or for some reason you miss the hints he throws at you, when he lies beside you it will be with his back facing you. Oh, his excuse will be that he can only fall asleep on that side of the bed facing that way. However, what he is really doing is pretending that you are no longer there and secretly wishing you were gone.

Either way, once you two are apart you can best bet that there will be no texts coming your way informing you how much he enjoyed the night. Oh, and that phone call he felt obligated to promise making to you later will not arrive as well. In those short 30 seconds after his first ejaculation, he had an epiphany. He realised that he was wrong to make love to you, that it should have never occurred. He had been struggling with his conscience for days about whether or not he should do this act, however, his lust for release and sexual needs won out.

It’s not that you’re not the prettiest girl on the block, it’s not that the sex wasn’t amazing because it probably was, it’s simply that he either doesn’t want to be in a relationship or he’s already in one just for starters. To begin with, you probably without realising it sent many sexual signals and the attention you gave him told him that you were an easy target to sleep with.

Now he’s battling himself because he knew he shouldn’t have slept with you, because it wasn’t fair. He was only in it (literally) to fill his own needs and now he has the burden of trying to tell you this and most times guys just can’t put the right words together that won’t piss you off. So you know what he does? He pretends that it never happened and hopes that it goes away.

But it won’t go away, will it. Not a chance because you think he’s the greatest thing since sliced bread and since he won’t call you, you call him, repeatedly. He on the other hand won’t answer, won’t return your texts and when you come online, he ignores you or signs off.

After awhile , you get angry and bitter and he becomes the scum of society in your eyes. Once you inform your girlfriends of your hurt, he becomes scum in their eyes as well. All because he wouldn’t do what I asked you to do with the guy who might fall in love with you above. What he should have done was to explain to you that the sex was great, however that he wasn’t really ready for a serious relationship at that time. Therefore realigning your expectations. (Oh, and this works even better if he tells you this before the sexual tryst, giving you the option of actually doing it or not.)

Also, you may note guys whom have done this to you and then after dodging your calls for a while all the sudden they become interested again. They start calling and before long you’re laying in bed beside them after the 30 seconds and once again they turn their back to you as before. Well dear, he’s simply a slave to his organ and although he continues to think “What the hell did I just do?”, time makes him forget and since you’ve made yourself available once again he figures what the hell. He still hasn’t changed, you’re simply missing the signs and setting yourself up for a major heartbreak and frustrating cycle.

Before I end this let me point out that these 30 seconds after ejaculation are a prime reason while many women become victims of one night stands. Hopefully, the next time you’ll identify it for what it is and by understanding what he’s thinking let him off the hook by taking the high road and quickly telling him you appreciate the romp, but thats all it was to you as well. This way, you reversed the role and he becomes the one night stand victim and not you.


16 comments on “What men think directly after ejaculation and how it could affect you

  1. Yup you hit the nail on the head. A word about the experience, many times the sex was not amazing but lousy. I go to great pains to get women off orally several times before I mount her and often pull out and go back down on her again and get her off again before I take my pleasure. If she refuses to go down on me then it is over, period and I am out of there. There is no equality there.

    Blessings on you and yours
    John Wilder

  2. Pingback: What men think directly after ejaculation and how it could affect you | DatingFuel.com

  3. definitely all about the mixed communications! Men speak one language, a very clear straight forward one usually, and women speak a much more complex language, where nothing is as it seems. Thanks for being a translator!

  4. Thanks, i just got the advice i’ve been looking for the past month. Hopefully next time ill make beter choices, but the 1st good choice will be that now he has to go!!

  5. Hehe, excellent post. Pryor is great stand up comedian and this example that you can ask anything from a man right before orgasm is pretty true. My wife do that to me sometimes 😉

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  7. Great Article Your blog post about this topic is convenience and inspiration with me. A friend once informed me about some of the suggestions you share however I thought it was not proper because I had some other opinion which had been kept with me for years. Regarding your article, I right now know John appeared to be right. I think I should send him a letter immediately. Probably include your website link likewise. He too has to know more of the things people have everyone has learned from your blog post. Thanks

  8. Wrong investigation for you. I came here thinking that this article was about a man’s immediate response to ejaculation, and whether it was as preponderant as I believe it is. Most guys I’ve spoken to, including myself, want nothing to do with a female for about 5-10 minutes after ejaculation. I asked my professor about this and he jokingly said that it is probably a residual product of our hunting days. After busting a fresh one in the wild, our ancestors would immediately leave to go hunting or handle other jungle related businesses instead of hanging around to cuddle. Well, consider me a complete hunter then. One of the things I’m least interested in after coming is cuddling. I would even prefer that you not even speak at all. But knowing how women are with their tongue, this is wishful thinking to say the least.

  9. Hey Gbl;ackmon
    This is why women HATE having sex with you because you make them
    feel like nothing more than a piece of meat that y0u just jacked off in . Women need to held and cuddles after sex so that they feel
    like there is an emotional connection. Otherwise you should just
    stick to blow up dolls. They don’t need to be held cuddles or talkde to.
    John Wilder

  10. obviously like your web site however you have to test the spelling on quite a few of your posts. A number of them are rife with spelling problems and I to find it very bothersome to inform the truth however I will certainly come again again.

    • Thank you for visiting. Please don’t be shy and comment as often as you like. Also, if you have a relationship question and would like a mans view, by all means drop me an e-mail. I answer all letters I receive.


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